chill~

been long since i sat down in my school library and chill. nvm that it is more noisy than normal libraries. actually its a pretty chill place.

I don't know what to do with myself too.

I am letting social media get the better of me. This is not something i want. Having a hiatus off social media is really a good option for me.

In the end also cannot blame anyone. Stuffs can do early never do. Not as if i never try. I am still learning how to self-motivate myself. Translating my thoughts into actions sounds so easy but executing it is so hard. Whats wrong with me man?!

I can't believe i am having such a low morale moment right now.

Zzz.

after that incident, i vowed that i would never live my life for others agn.

或许我最错的决定，就是爱错了人。 本来就不应该开始。 没有后悔，只能继续往前看。

Talent?

I must admit, i really cannot get my mind through music composition. I really want to just compose a simple tune for today's problem but after a couple of bars, POOM, im stuck again. Its kind of a very sian feeling. I really wonder if i got no skill in understanding music theory, or i just simply can't be good at it.

There is nothing wrong in the module. In fact, it is fairly easy to score for this module. But some things so simple, require a bit of talent too. I would just say i really got no talent for music composition for now. I still await the day i can compose something simple and to my satisfaction.

Sometimes, we want to be that somebody with a certain quality. But if i really don't have what it takes, whats the next move?

Yeaps, even though it does not help me in completing my work today for this module. At least i felt slightly better. Just slightlyyy ...

Weirdly Puzzled

I realised, the most amazing people i met in my life were mostly through working. The process of making friends indeed has grown much harder as i grow up. Just looking back, few years ago when you have a bunch of friends whom you were so close with, compared to now, sometimes when we bumped into each other, you kind of get the awkward expression from the other party. Actually i also don't understand how come the situation can be awkward. To me, i always felt great to see old friends. I guess, when people made new friends, they don't remember the memories they had with the previous groups of friends yea?

this is dehydration

On Dec 4, i ran my first 21.1km Standard Chartered Marathon. So for the first time i thought i was gonna die. This is the result of not having full preparation beforehand. After a few days, i found out that after my run that day, i was suffering from dehydration. No wonder the second half of the race when i drank Ice Mountain from the drink stations, i felt nothing. Only 100 Plus managed to give me the boost i needed.

My time for 21.1km was 3 hours 8 mins. Totally not something to be proud of, but definitely something worth remembering. After running 21.1km, i highly question how do people even tahan 42.195km?! After the run the only thing i want to do is to lie down and close my eyes man. I was totally shag to the extent i dun even feel hungry.

So after that i struggled my way home and i did not even eat anything. I only wanted to sleep. LOL. Indeed, i slept straight after i bathed.

What an experience. Haha.