Weirdly Puzzled

I realised, the most amazing people i met in my life were mostly through working. The process of making friends indeed has grown much harder as i grow up. Just looking back, few years ago when you have a bunch of friends whom you were so close with, compared to now, sometimes when we bumped into each other, you kind of get the awkward expression from the other party. Actually i also don't understand how come the situation can be awkward. To me, i always felt great to see old friends. I guess, when people made new friends, they don't remember the memories they had with the previous groups of friends yea?

this is dehydration

On Dec 4, i ran my first 21.1km Standard Chartered Marathon. So for the first time i thought i was gonna die. This is the result of not having full preparation beforehand. After a few days, i found out that after my run that day, i was suffering from dehydration. No wonder the second half of the race when i drank Ice Mountain from the drink stations, i felt nothing. Only 100 Plus managed to give me the boost i needed.

My time for 21.1km was 3 hours 8 mins. Totally not something to be proud of, but definitely something worth remembering. After running 21.1km, i highly question how do people even tahan 42.195km?! After the run the only thing i want to do is to lie down and close my eyes man. I was totally shag to the extent i dun even feel hungry.

So after that i struggled my way home and i did not even eat anything. I only wanted to sleep. LOL. Indeed, i slept straight after i bathed.

What an experience. Haha.

人，如果要改，根本不需要说，怎么样都会改。
到头来，还是看自己。

明白，是一个很单纯的形容词。但是只要有一天我们选择不去明白，我们可能永远都不会理解。

世界充满了色彩，我们还是不应该忘了黑与白的单纯。

Good results? Mehh~

Do you all think that results are important? There are people with good results that do not give me a good impression. Of course, i have also met people with good results AND good attitude.

Results is a decoy for people who are smart and can score well, to tell people that they are good model students. However, their working attitude and some other qualities maybe quite bad to start with. People are being fooled into looking up to them like good examples.

So at the end of the day, is results important? For me, its a no. Having a humble attitude and the way we conduct ourselves surpasses good results. In the short run, people with good results gets all the credit. In the long run, your attitude and conduct will be a more contributing factor.

Hi Stanger! :)

After school last friday, i was hesitating whether to proceed to the bus-stop to take a bus to or make the choice of walking to the bus interchange instead. What prompted me to hesitate was a pretty interesting encounter.

About 100 metres from the point where i had to make a decision of either taking the bus or walking, i saw this girl and obviously she had just finished class too. The thing that made me notice her was, she was quite tall for a girl, about the same height as me. And coincidentally, she was walking at about the same speed as me, which is pretty fast. *I had no idea where we both were rushing to. HAHA.*
And so, i took a couple of glances at her, and she took a couple of glances at me too! *raises eyebrows*
Apparently, we noticed each other because of the walking speed.


Soooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo,


I chose to walk to the bus interchange because this girl was walking too. *SO GOT MOTIVE RIGHT*
All the while we were walking at about the same speed. When we were somewhere at the mrt station, i saw that she was behind me through a mirror's reflection. I was thinking, maybe she is taking the train while i am taking the bus. But NO, she was taking bus too! OK, that is coincidence?


I DON'T BELIEVE SHE TAKING THE SAME BUS AS ME.


In the end, she went to queue for bus 161, while i queued for bus 966.


Not the kind of ending you expected? But did i manage to keep the suspense? HAHA *Fail*

the last thing i ever want is to quarrel with my friends.

Sleep early god damn it!

Its late night thoughts again. Totally can't sleep early for the past month, damn. Was reading about this article regarding celebrity dads on their views and lifestyle after becoming a dad. One of the comment made by this celebrity dad was that he told his kid not to lie but the next moment he lied and he had to explain why he lied to his kid. He said that the world of kids consist of only black and white. In relevance to his, it was varying degrees of grey. That sentence pretty much left me thinking as i proceeded on to read other articles.

As a kid, we only know we just had to do what our parents told us, everything was pretty much straightforward. We go to school to make friends, study hard to do well for exams, train hard in our cca to earn a spot in the school team, watch movies and hang out with friends like any other kid and etc.

Upon entering poly, everything pretty much changed. The world of black and white, sadly did not turn out to be full of colours, instead fading into faint grey. I went out working part time and saw more of what is the outside world. I met people, with reference to, where looks can be deceiving. At times i felt that i was fake too because i wasn't a person who like to hold grudges with anyone, and i had to pretend to be acceptable to people that i disapproved too. Over time, i just told myself, i could not please everyone. I would not even bother to make that extra effort to do so. Just look at the people around us now, who is 100% real, or even 70%?

I chanced upon this pretty amusing comic strip 2 days ago. It goes like, "Why do we even have facebook, twitter? Because we are afraid of being lonely." We follow each other's activities and what comes out? Pretty much nothing. To put it bluntly, sometimes we need reminders about others being worse than us so that we can self comfort ourself. Isn't that pretty sad?

Thoughts.

I'm not sure whether is it just me or that whenever my i received my pay, i do not head to the bank immediately to like bank it in. The temptation to immediately bank in the money and spend it is not in my dictionary. I could always wait like as long as one week to two weeks before banking it in.

I constantly see stuffs on the net, in stores that i would love to have. But if i buy every other nice things that i see, i will be pretty much broke, or let's say, negatively poor?

There will always be nicer things released every other day, it's really up to self control to buy what is really neccessary. It is fashionable to follow trends, but at this point of age, following trends to me is a pretty high price which i am not willing to pay for.

If we lived for the sake of looking forward to pay day, that would be a pretty sad thing isn't it?

Good read

"Getting lost is something to be embraced, not feared."

Read more: James Durston: Photography has ruined travel | CNNGo.com http://www.cnngo.com/explorations/life/tell-me-about-it/james-durston-photography-has-ruined-travel-361992#ixzz1dnGYJPRY

I'm Famous!

Just kidding :)

Blah.

OKAYE, another body found at bedok reservoir. Pretty puzzled at whats going on around the area. Serial killer?

On a side note, as much as there is a trend of people commiting suicide at the reservoir, i do not think it is funny to make fun of the reservoir continously. Once or twice still ok. More than that, i find that it is pretty lame and NOT COOL.

Have a great weekend :)

I definitely enjoyed my Friday night. Everything went sort of unplanned because i did not even plan to go out today. All it took was 5 mins and i was on my way preparing to meet a friend for dinner somewhere around Haji Lane area. Impromptu FTW!

It was my first time at Maison Ikkoku. The quietness of the place is something i embrace. A sandwich consisting of spicy chicken in the middle of Cibbata bread and a cup of MI Latte does the trick for a Friday night. With just an additional 3 customers in the cafe other than us, all i could say is, SHIOK :)

I only spent three hours plus outside but enjoyable is the word for it.

There is something that i couldn't disagree more upon.
You need to have a lot of time with someone else, be it the special someone or not, to enjoy every moment.
Nopes, this sentence does not work for me :)

The journey to uncover more new places shall continueeeeeeeeee~

Get it in the head!

I am kind of getting sick to those love quotes on facebook or twitter. I do not know if anyone agrees with this, but,

NO ONE FREAKING FOLLOWS A TEMPLATE FOR LOVE!

Doesn't mean your partner did not treat you according to the way the quote says, it means your partner does not love you. COME ON, EVERYONE IS DIFFERENT IN EXPRESSING THEIR THOUGHTS.

Middle

The channel 8 drama is not helping when it is playing a sad scene with Hebe's song.

The Oath really puts u in situations where you are standing in the middle of law and life. As a doctor, u got a responsibility to save a patient's life on the verge of death. However, when there are illegal dealings concerning the patient's life, would u still save the patient?

HAIYA

As much as im looking for ways to relax myself, i know i couldn't because this semester is quite a tight one. Suddenly i felt as if im being caught aback by what is happening around me. It stills boils down to my self-discipline, which i hate to admit, is BAD.

Its not that i haven't been trying to work things out. Sometimes the desire wanting to be better as an individual is strong, but at the end of the day, perhaps all that improved was my mental being. My actions still have much proving to do. Not to others, but sometimes i had a hard time convincing myself too.

I hate days like this where i set out determined to do something but in turn i don't know where the determination died to.

Ok, screw this. Tomorrow will be a better day.

Self-reflection point

Went to watch a Thai performance on Sunday at University Cultural Centre.
When almost the whole of thailand is flooded, the performers still chose to come and perform due to professionalism.
When Singapore is raining the past few days, all we want to do is to skip school and have a good sleep at home.
I believe Thai people still cannot afford to sleep in a peace of mind for this coming months.

L

The feeling of loneliness is back to haunt me again.

Do you have this?

An Act of Courage, A Leap of Faith.

I just felt that social media like Facebook and Twitter are just mediums used to express our thoughts, sharing funny, interesting and meaningful things with people. However, from a general point of view, i felt that failed relationships are due to thoughts being expressed on Facebook or Twitter. Yes, sometimes the truth hurts, but some people just can't take the truth. Thoughts expressed when we are sad or angry do affect our partners i suppose. Imagine last time where there were no Facebook or Twitter, many things are pretty simplified. At least you don't see people spreading negativity on the net! We are sort of in an era where we want to freely express our thoughts. Of course, there are consequences behind that too~

one thing to note, i dun like researching for music terms.

uncertainity

the uncertainity of the future is overwhelming. i wonder how some people can be ignorant of how their lives will turn out 10 to 20 years down the road. its either they can't be bothered, if not they are fully living their present life.

somtimes, i realli need to find inner peace.

tangled

A few days ago, i was un-tangling my earphones and this struck me.
Actually i am just like the earphones, untangling myself from whatever stress in the society.

I just feel that, in Singapore, life will be really hard for me in future. All i can see is that, in future, i will keep doing what i can to break free from the demands of society. Breaking free from the vicious cycle in Singapore where money defines your status. Without money, you are nobody. Everything is just too practical where i guess, humanity and compassion lacks, or might be absent in future.

just now i spent 45 mins playing a game when i could use the same amount of time to work out a little.

URGH~

hanging ...

im trying to adapt back to singapore. thailand sure gave me pretty much insights. the aftermath of the trip jus kept me hanging...

long day at work ~

work today (Friday) was pretty hard towards the end of the day. no idea y i culdn concentrate well after lunch. towards the end of the day, a couple of complications made it even harder. but well, difficulties are always present to make us learn as a whole.

at times, i dun wana blame others for giving me some kind of troubles at wrong timings. i jus blame myself for not knowing enough to be able to handle the situation better, by myself.

Choice & Choices

I felt that, along the way of growing up, not only did i have to prepare myself physically, but mentally too.

While we were growing up, i am sure many of us made decisions upon ourselves at times. At certain times, we were not sure whether our choice was a right one.
Three years ago, after getting my 'O' Levels results, i had to ponder which path to head to. My future was a complete blur state to me. I was very sure i am not going for a 9 - 5 job which requires me to sit in front of a computer and "interact" with the computer all the while. I would prefer a job which requires more versatility.
I submitted the form and got posted to Baking & Culinary Science, Temasek Polytechnic, my third choice. I still remember, when i saw the results, i had slightly woke up and just merely checked out that one message that was awaiting me to view. I saw the results and continued to sleep, without much thought.
On the same day, i decided to appeal from the third choice to the fourth choice, which i believed would puzzle many of my friends. Most of them felt that, with my results (which was not superb nor too lousy), i could go into a BETTER polytechnic. However, it was a choice where i felt i could bear the responsibility to in the years to come.

Three years down, I am still in the course which i appealed to, Diploma in Sonic Arts, Republic Polytechnic, third year student, on the verge of graduation in around half a year. I have not regret my decision back then. Yes, i am still a nobody in my area of study, but i haven't been totally ignorant of my choice back then.

Growing up, we had many decisions to make. Growing older, we had to shoulder more responsibilities. Sometimes, we let responsibilities get the better of us and we give up. But, life is really a sum of all choices, for me. Not all choices are perfect. Some of them taught me lessons which made me grow mentally.
In my 19 years of life, it was not totally sweet and nice. In fact, the recent couple of years were not really great for me. There was a year where i lost myself and now i am still in the midst of piecing myself back.

I should not forget that, in any case,
i am living my life,
for no one else,
but for

Myself.

?

so wad do ppl get for complaining so much abt army? complain for 2 yrs come out everyting back to square one.

wads next?

感触良多

Made a trip back to Maris Stella today. It was still great to see those teachers who made a difference in my life back then. Seeing them really made me think back, regardless good or bad, it does not matter to me.

Life in secondary school wasn't superb, but these teachers made it possible. Some things had changed in the school. They had better facilities compared to my time. Every corner of the school where i walked, there were certain flashbacks. How time flies~ Some of the teachers, the first time i saw them was 5 or 6 years ago! Some of them left, which is kind of sad. I still wish them well wherever they go, whatever they are pursuing.

Words just can't describe the feeling that is running inside me. Still, i would like to say a big Thank You to these teachers.

Miss Marianne Png: She offered great help in helping me with Maths, one of my favourite teachers in secondary school.
Miss Lee Shiao Pey: I can't think of any phrase to describe her. She is as amusing as always. HAHA.
Miss Lee Kim Hong: My form teacher for Sec 3 & 4. Did a pretty good job teaching Chemistry.
Mr Low: My Geography teacher who showed us Planet Earth during lessons. One of the most nice and humble person i met.
Mr Chiam: My very first chinese teacher in secondary school. He wrote his chinese words the old school way, top to bottom.
Mr Ng Chor Yam: Maths HOD who did a great job in teaching Maths. It was a pity he only taught us for awhile, but nevertheless, a great teacher in his field.
Mr Tan Hui Kuan: Mr Nice physics teacher. Forever honest looking. Hahahaha.
*Special mention: Mrs Patricia Kong.

Adding on to this, i would like to thank my teachers in Primary School & Poly. Too much names to be mentioned. Sadly, i could not meet all the teachers i mentioned above, hope i will see them outside or something.

Happy Teacher's Day to all great and noble teachers! :)

Mixed feelings ~

Self - Discipline

Self-discipline has been bad this couple of weeks. Adapting to a lifestyle of an employee is not easy. But it had been a great learning process though!

Sometimes, i wonder if i tried to hard to be the best i can, or i am trying to be perfect. Since there is nothing such as perfect, i guess sometimes i am setting too high expectations of myself. Of course, i do not fulfil my expectations everytime.

heart beat? heart stop?

work today was pretty shag, so when the train came n i saw a seat, i jus decided to take it.
was halfway through my journey n duno y, suddenly the thought of death came to my mind. it sort of took me aback. i wondered wad is the feeling when yor soul leaves yor body. i wondered wad will i be in my next life. i wondered wad if the moment u closed yor eyes, it was goodbye.

for a moment, i think my heart skipped a beat. next moment, i took a deep breath, knowing im much more fortunate than some people out there.

lonely lonely lonely lonely loneleh ...

i realised, after im single after november last yr, im still pretty much lonely. well, i guess i always was.

sometimes, it came to a point when u needed to call someone out for a meal or chill out. n it turns out, it was the same couple of ppl dat i used to call perhaps a year ago n b4. i mean, dats pretty sad isn it? so wad happens when these few ppl are busy? well, im left alone again. LOL.

perhaps ppl may find me boring or whatsoever. but ppl hu knows me well knew that actually im quite lame n not afraid of making a fool of myself personally. so, i guess not everyone is used to the way i behave n so on. sometimes when ur lonely, u tend to take a step back, n reflect. i tink of my actions, the way i treat ppl, the way i carry myself, the way i do tings, the way i think, the tings i say n etc. of coz not everyone will like everything abt u. but i guess humans jus behaves in a pretty predictable way. when u find a trait in tis person where u totally cnnt agree on, u jus list tis person as "hi-bye fren". we dun even go n discover the traits of tis person which might be similar to us, the "X Factor" which might make us khakis or "brothers".

humans r realli weird to some extent. we proscatinate, we backstab friends, we were never satisfied, we love, *or perhaps use a word more powerful like VERY MUCH LOVE?" to complain and so onnnnnnnnnnnnn *notice there is no full stop after the sentence because i tink humans got nv-ending grumbles*

so do humans understand themselves? to a certain extent i would say. i lived for 19 years and i have not decided on my career path yet. as a reminder, im already a quarter past the average lifespan of human beings.

Retarded?

Was at Wheelock Place just now and of course i passed by Boarders which had already shut down its shutters. What puzzled me was, why are people taking pictures of the already closed down place. Its just kind of a retarded action to me. Well, some Singaporeans are funny ...

An encounter with Sebastian Professional

Today, i happened to meet people from Sebastian Professional at my workplace, Camwerkz. it was really very coincidence because one of their personnel came to chat with me and i just asked him if he knows the brand Sebastian after listening roughly to what he does for a living. it turned out that he knew this brand and when he told me he was the Sebastian representative for China, i was quite stunned actually. after telling him i actually uses their clay for hair-styling, he introduced me to the representatives for the other countries. it was definitely a quite "malu" moment for me because i just could not believe my eyes. out of nowhere, these people are representing the brand of the clay i had been using for the past 3 years! to appreciate their thanks, they gave me one of their clay products which i am very grateful for!

I love their clay because it gives a very natural look and a pretty good hold.
Support Sebastian Professional!
http://www.sebastianprofessional.co.uk/en_GB/index.jsp

branded goods.

i don't go after branded goods. they are for people to see. i find them meaningless.

-Singaporean footballer Shi Jia Yi

On a side note, it opened up my perspectives of branded goods.

Define nice?

The place quite nice!
The food very nice!
The movie very nice!

So, can anyone tell me what is the definition of nice?

One good example. During chinese new year period this year, The Green Hornet started screening in cinemas and i saw alot of people commenting that it was nice, on facebook. And so happen that a couple of my cousins are watching it during chinese new year day one, i went ahead to catch the movie with them after visiting. Conclusion, the movie was not as good as i expected. I mean, yes, Jay Chou's role was pretty not bad. But overall, i don't remember a "WOW" point in the movie. From this experience, i can conclude that the definition of nice of other people was greatly different from mine.

Another example. This is a highly personal choice of mine. I always prefer to dine in not so high profile restaurants because there always seem to be too much hype for the brand rather than the food itself. I would never understand eating steamboat in a shopping centre. The food you get for the steamboat is highly pathetic for the price you pay. Definitely a "no-no" for me.

Lastly, Starbucks is definitely not nice to me. The only drink i like from there would be Caramel Frappacinno (don't know whether spelt like this) but it is not a "DIE DIE" must drink for me. If i have the craving for it, then i MIGHT(still not a must) get it. But i cannot live without traditional coffee. Yes, it is cheap coffee but it is coffee which is made with effort.

For those who wants to label me as an uncle, be my guest. The definition of nice definitely differs from person to person. However, i believe most of the times, humans say something is nice because others say it is nice too. Monkey see monkey do isn't it? Haha.

knock knock.

a few wks ago, i went to walk the railway tracks b4 dey officially tear down everyting dat is left. overall, i realli enjoyed the experience. i stil loved the feeling of getting in touch wif nature. i borrowed a camera frm my workplace, took some fotos, which onli some turned out nice coz i realised im not realli patient in taking pictures. after awile, i jus wanted to enjoy the feeling of walking the trail.

yes, i hav not taken the train frm tanjong pagar to JB b4. however, when i visted tanjong pagar b4 it closed down, i saw it for the first time n quite liked the feeling of the railway station. compared to buses, i stil prefer the feeling of the train even though i have nv taken it b4. the train is smth where i culd feel a closer connection wif. compared to buses, u jus treat it like a mode of transport to another place. if i have taken the train, i guess i wuld love the sounds of hooting n scratching of the train tracks more.

i realised i hav a liking for old skl stuffs more. i prefer normal bakeries to breadtalk n atas bread shops. i like hawker food more compared to restaurants. i liked how anyone can eat at a hawker n do not tink abt dining etiquettes at the restaurant. i remembered a couple of months back i was having brunch at crystal jade at airport wif my family on a weekend afternoon n the moment i stepped into the restaurant, i thought i was at a wet market, or somewhere worse than dat. definitely not a veri pleasant experience for me. i wuld prefer going to somewhere nearby my hse n hav a simple plate of beehoon which tastes freakingly cheap n nice. i wun go to crystal jade n pay a few dollars for a bowl of porridge unless im sick n had no choice of food other than porridge.

i discovered tis wonderful coffee place at newton area last wkend. the place is so ulu dat i love the exclusivity of it. the main door is a backalley. dat was wad attracted me. it was small, perhaps abt the size of the flat im living in now, but i love the coziness of the place. well, i wun share it coz im so selfish n dunwan to let more ppl noe abt it. unless i feel ur worth my time n effort to bring to the place. wad an ass am i. LOL.

its the wkends agn! hav a little fun, work it out a little. enjoy the wkends :)

old injury

if memories are hurtful, shld we call dem memories?

i mean, memories are mostly memorable. so, memorable stuffs are mostly positive stuffs.

how abt we call it an old injury? an old injury doesn always flare up at certain instances, but sometimes it still does. jus like how old people's knees wuld ache whenever its going to rain.

#random thought that came to mind

Intern vs Student

Disclaimer: The following is just some of the thoughts and scenarios which will happen to anyone at internship. It is just some difference of being a student and being an intern. My internship company treats me very well and i have no complaints of continue to work for them, in fact i had just converted from an intern to a part-time staff. The company you get posted to might not be directly related to whatever you are studying. However, if you do not open up yor mind and treat it as a learning experience, you might as well not go for intern at all. Of course, the beginning was hard for me. A lot of stuffs i have never seen before in the company. However, over time, i started to blend in with the environment and definitely enjoyed myself pretty much! I met customers who are good and of course there are the troublesome ones. I even met some people who had taught in Republic Poly before!

The following is just a make-up of what you may go through in internship. It is definitely just for entertainment purposes. For those going to internship, "Welcome to the society :)"

Student: Today rainy weather so shiok for slping, jus pon school lur!
Intern: Today rainy weather so shiok for slping. *looks at clock, time for work. drags body up no matter how nice the weather is*

Student: Today lesson so boring, arbo we partial go watch movie more shiok!
Intern: Today like not much tings to do, but den have to wait until 6.30pm den knock off.

Student: Lesson so sian. *keeps msg-ing, msn, facebook, twitter* jitao chiong all the tings u can do on yor laptop to kill time.
Intern: Abit no mood for work uh, but bo bian must tell myself not to slack.

Student: We lunch break shiok shiok den go back dun nid do ppt liao. jus hag care nia.
Intern: Lunch is smth for u to replenish yor energy for the rest of the day until u knock off.

Student: wahs siao liao, wake up late! nvm lur, today dun go school lor :)
Intern: SIAO LIAO! LATE LIAO LATE LIAO! *immediately bathes n cab to office*

Student: Next week holiday lo!
Intern: All my frens holiday but i still having internship. cnnt go out n hav fun wif dem :(

*Do not be afraid of internship, just do your best :)

made me laugh abit at 1am.

Quoted from someone else's blog.

"Exams are a big thing here in Singapore. I remember i heard the legend of a boy whose A'level English paper topic was "Courage".

He submitted his paper that scribbled "THIS IS COURAGE."

And got an A for it"

:)

survived the past 1 week without my laptop. it went for service. gud dat deres not much damage done.

internship has been gud so far. when 2 of my colleagues went on leave, alot of tings i had to depend on myself. when dey were present, i had dem to tackle situations presented by customers. when dey r on leave, i bo bian mus find ways to tackle myself. it was gud training. at least it made me familiarise wif a couple more tings. not all, but stil more to come :)

as i grow up, i feel dat i had lesser frens. not in the sense, where there were no new frens. i mean, ppl realli do come n go. but i jus feel, sometimes we jus shldn depend on others to come. sometimes we hav to go n make the connection too. looking bak, i realli lose contact wif quite a number of ppl. at times where i bumped into frens outside, some of dem were ppl i once had close contact wif. for dat moment, i wished we culd tok more n update each other on wads been happening but circumstances always dun allow.

sometimes u wonder if u meant anyting in ppl's life?

today is a day, u feel like jus putting on a long sleeve casual top, wif shorts n sandals, to soak into the weather on a wkend.

when ur forced to grow up, u realli shld. coz one day u hav to grow up too. trust me, growing up earlier is better than u tot. u might tot its bad, but its not.

TV THOUGHTS

was watching tv jus now after coming bak frm running errands for myself. was watching tis drama n dere was tis scene where one of the sisters asked her sister to prevent their dad frm attending her graduation ceremony. the reason was, she didn wan to be embarrassed infront of her bf's parents coz their family business is regarding the casket business for the dead. basically, dey handle funeral services for the dead.

to me, doing funeral business is not smth widely recognised by the majority of the society i guess. however, in another way, tis business takes care of the final journey for the dead. imagine if no one does tis, yor own family might not even take care of the preparations for the final journey of their own family member. alot of ppl wuld be hindered by taboos n religion. so in the end, the body might jus be left at the hospital for it to rot. or in a worst case, jus tucked into some place where it culd be left to rot by itself. hu noes wad happens after dat.

imagine if yor future partner's family is doing tis, wuld u consider twice sticking wif him/her?
for me, dere is nth hideous abt tis business. it is a proper n legal business which deserves respect for the commitment n taboos involved.

angry for little reason =.=''

carn believe i watch bball game watch until abit angry jus now. coz my fav team lost a game jus now. urghhh. nvm, leng jing ~

been recuperating at home since tuesday due to illness. ZZZ. learn a lesson after every illness. same goes for tis one. work hard ok. work too hard but nv rest enuf den is not gud alrdy.

keep saving up ~

lame.

a fairytale is a fairytale. bad tings happen in fairytales too.

life is not a fairytale. no one said it was.
we wanted it to be a fairytale, but i noe it wun happen.
so wad if we r in a fairytale? i feel dat we need some negative tings to balance out wadeva is gud.
huever is wishing upon fairytale, gud luck to u. hope dat u faster wake up frm the fairytale.

haha.

by rite shld be an off day on a monday. but got work offer, might as well take it. was tinking of using the off day to cook smth new as experiment. its alrite, can stil do it next wk.

went for a workout after coming bak frm work jus now. suddenly wan to work out. went for a little jog. along the way up to my hse, did push ups n crunches. whoot whoot, keep going ~

jus a thought

if i had more money, i wuldn spend so much on clothes n eating.

instead i wuld save it for a trip to some awesome places wif the special someone.

Cheers to getaways.

update.

life is stil ok. 3 wks into internship, its ok too. tings realli will be different when u change the way u approach it. trying to pick up as many tings as i can at workplace. 1st few days realli is ??? all the way. but at least now not dat bad, stil can answer VERI BASIC questions. in a blink of an eye, dat will be the end of first month of internship. stil tinking n walking step by step for the future. do not wish to limit myself to smth too particular yet. still getting exposed to more tings to widen my knowledge in different aspects.

jiayous, can do it one :)

一路走来

results r released on the 22nd. being the typical me, totally not anxious at all. coz exam taken, can change nth abt it. i ownself got work hard anot i will noe. tis shld be the most productive semester i have been through poly.

results r not straight As. i didn expect myself to aim for straight As too. but i scanned through my previous 2 tests n the final test, hey, i did improve! the improvement might seem insignificant to others, but i noe how i got those results. its smth no one other than me wuld understand. i did not work hard like a bull. but i did work smarter tis time round. i focused more on my daily grades. paid more attention in class n did my RJ seriously. not all of the RJs, but majority of it. when i put effort into dem, the results prove it.

一路走来不容易，但是还是熬过了。继续进步，继续成长。Life is a sum of all choices.

安静

对未来充满希望，也带点害怕。
对爱情还是渴望，但害怕再被伤害。
今天，觉得自己好安静。
只渴望一点平静与平衡。

food for thought

my fren n his gf quite funnie. dey dun look like a couple. but the way dey communicate jus amazes me. at times, dere is no need to be like any other couple. being different works too.

food for thought.

do re mi fa so

yes, its veri late now. during holidays, the body clock jus gets screwed. or in another way, i screw it myself. i always got the mood to blog during the wee hrs of the morning. i duno y.

was jus listening to Xiao Hong Ren songs. jus find it pretty amazing how his songs captivates me. the lyrics he uses r pretty simple. no fanciful idioms or chim vocab inside. but he made me "feel" the song.

i broke it dwn n guess dat it has got to do wif the melody. yes, i totally culdn understand wad i learnt for Music Composition module. but it somehow affected the way i look at music after going through the module. the kind of key we use, the type of scale affects how the music turns out. the type of instruments n type of notes play a part too. for example, we carn possibly keep using crochets throughout the song. sometimes, we nid to blend in quavers n even semi-quavers to give some variations to the song. im definitely not at the stage dat i understand music damn well. but its smth i realise after going through the module. another perspective realised for me today :)

the place i wuld drop by if i happen to be at the shopping centre is "That CD Shop". its like one of the amazing places in Singapore.
step foot into the shop, listen to the music dey play, add it on wif quality speakers. *OOH* How beautiful is life :)
the music dey play is always gud. the classical music is not those concertos one. concertos is too boring for leisure listening.

tis is always the scenario when im in "That CD Shop". *listens to the music, taps feet according to the tempo. move along to the music by walking around in one area of the shop*

Dreams.

quite slpy now ler, but blog abit den slp.

did abit of music composition jus now. brain abit dead liao. so stopped doing it after some time. tmr gona study for sound synthesis. do notes n go to test n den everyting will be fine coz is open book :) i believe i can do better for music composition tis time round. jiayous to myself :):)

last wk i watched finish the first season of MasterChef America. it was one of the best reality show i watched. i duno whether reality show is the correct phrase. but anyways, its a cooking competition n one of the judges was Gordon Ramsay, quite a big shot eh. one ting i notice abt him is, whenever he tastes food, after putting it into his mouth, he tend to look up for awile. i guess he is trying to c if the food he tasted culd give him any feelings. haha.

i finished a book last wk too. the title is called, "Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother" by Amy Chua. a pretty interesting read. the way the asian mother brought up her kids was pretty harsh. but in a way, it did bring out the potential of her kids. both her kids excelled in piano n violin. one of the tings i find it veri hard to grasp was, she made a point for her kids to practice the piano n violin even when dey r on vacation. imagine u go vacation still nid to practise. its like holiday day leh. haha. the younger daughter did love the piano lur, n she dun mind being a musician. the older daughter loved the violin too, jus dat she had her own mindset n she gave up violin for tennis. after some time, she did miss the violin, but at the same time she loved tennis. it shows dat the same upbringing cnnt be applied to both daughters. but i pretty appreciate the fact dat the mother was harsh on her daughters when dey r young to bring out the potential in dem.

after i read the book, i felt dat, sometimes its not we r dumber than other ppl. its jus dat, our lvl of tinking was not processed enuf to make us strive harder. i duno y after reading the book, i sense myself working abit harder than last time. n im slowly finding my goal in skl. for now, the ultimate goal wuld be a top notch Sound Designer in singapore. i wuld love to make a name in singapore n let other ppl noe dat despite the small industry we hav here, dreams r still possible.

Dreams, i can c u all more clearly now. Thanks for making me strive for u no matter how hard circumstances might seem.

no feel.

quite a number of ppl sent me chinese new yr wishes. i looked at dem, n put my fone dwn n continued wif wadeva i was doing. ask me y i did dat? coz i dun freaking feel anyting for chinese new yr. i'll wish dem bak later. haha.

dun slack.

chinese new yr is coming~ alrites, deres not much hype abt it seriously. nid to prevent the "slack mode" frm coming even though its new yr. UT3 is happening on my birthday! LOL! time to plan out a 2 week schedule to prepare for UT3!

i took a cab to skl on friday due to me being veri late. n so, i met an interesting taxi driver. tis taxi driver, was similar to me in some ways. was chatting to him throughout. found out dat actually hes quite a nice guy but he got alot of views abt the government. haha. he said dat he hated the government n etc. he drove through SPCA n he told me he jus adopted 4 guinea pigs jus the wk b4. adding on to dat, he said the government is going to tear down the place after the lease expires. he say its very sad n said the government got no "ai xin". the tings dat doesn make money for dem dey jus take it away. n he say SPCA the land is a small area nia n the government dun even bother to keep it. true to a certain extent?

another instance is when we drove past my hse nearby dere. den he was looking at a poster wif bak kua on the poster. i jus commented dat tis yr more expensive uh. den he said where got new yr den nid to eat bak kua. bak kua can eat anytime. same goes for abalone. does dat mean eating abalone will make u huat for the rest of the year? when i hear him say tis, its like, "wahs, tis guy totally same as me sia!" HAHA. dats wad i feel too. so wad if u eat bak kua n abalone on new yr? its like these stuffs r available throughout the year. but some ppl make so much hype abt eating it during new yr. like =.='' to me. he added on n said we shld treat everyday as new yr n live everyday happily. totally true to me ~

he went on n asked me whether i feel any hype frm new yr. i jus answered no. he said singapore losing the hype coz everyting is abt 'work n loan, work n loan'. he say singaporeans r becoming more like zombies coz we jus work like mad jus for the money n den pay loans. at the end of the day, we r jus like "dead". tis i agree wif him. even for me, an 18 yr old approaching 19, im starting to tink abt how am i going to survive in singapore in the future. the ting is, i haven even finish my poly studies! im worrying whether i got money to support myself in future. whether i got money for a car? a house? my own expenses? my wedding? like seriously. dey keep increasing the prices for house n COE. next time i tink i jus settle money for buying a room, n money for buying a wheel enuf liao.

alrites, slping in less than 10 mins time ~

:(:(:(

u came into my life n u left :(

i hav tis sucky feeling inside me which i tink culd make my brain explode.

:(

on tues nite, i was having mixed feelings in me. firstly, i was happie for one of my gud frens hu had a gf like finally. but after feeling happie, i started feeling abit gloomy coz i tot of u.

knew i'll be stuck in a shitty situation agn, i sms-ed my fren to come online n chat wif me. great dat it helped quite alot.

haix, tough times uh ~

pretty fast wk previously. 3 days of tests consecutively. tis wk got one test, which is abit better than the last.

hav been noticing sandara frm 2ne1 recently. shes pretty man! carn believe shes 26.

deep in thought. y did it cross my mind?

gona be a bz next two wks. jiayous to huever reads tis :)

urgh ~

i duno y tonite i feel so like abit nua n oso like veri hard to concentrate. tink i today too tired. slpt on the bus, reach home ler eat liao oso wan to fall aslp =.=''

its another nite when my mind is at its weakest state n u infiltrate my mind.
seriously i hate to tink bak. but if i can shut my brain n not tink bak, i wuld do it. i wished we culd talk out our feelings since its been one month plus since the break up. i hate tis feeling where we r nowhere here nor dere. i duno whether its affecting u coz its affecting me. the reason y im feeling all tis is not coz im sad or wad. coz its painful to lose smth i cherish alot. it hurts even more coz i had dreams which included u. both of us nids to be responsible for the break up in one way or the other. it doesn matter to me hu initiated the break up in the first place. it doesn matter to me now.